Costumes To Blend In When The Apes Take Over
It's been common knowledge for decades now that the apes are eventually going to become super-intelligent and overthrow human civilization. I'm not sure why Charlton Heston thought it was such a big deal when he saw the Statue of Liberty - what, are apes really going to worry about maintaining human landmarks? Of course not.
At any rate, the great uprising is coming sooner than we know. This is why it's important to be prepared. Someday, these costumes may be the difference between life and death for you - or awkward and slightly less awkward. You can never be too prepared.
1. Goin' Ape
You'd make that face too if you were fooling an entire race of super-intelligent apes. That's showing those monkeys who's boss! (This attitude can only lead to positive things.)
Some apes might wear clothes. I mean, prognosticators have found that in the future, that Dr. Zaius fellow will totally wear clothes.
I'm pretty sure this is the funkiest gorilla costume I've ever seen. The jazz hands alone will dazzle our future conquerors.
4. Complete Chimpanzee
Now this a monkey of a manner of blending in, if you ask me!
5. Over Sized Gorilla
I'm pretty sure nobody will invite you to monkey parties when your costume makes a face like this. This is probably a good thing. Monkey parties are less fun than they sound.
6. Mischievous Monkey
If any of the apes give your baby a funny look, just tell them it's a human baby being eaten by your ape-offspring. Foolproof.
7. GW Of The Apes
Not only will you blend in, but you'll be topical!
8. Black Chimp Hands
Gloves like these might come in handy if our ape overlords ever suggest that you put your hands in the air as though you were particularly lacking in cares.
9. Plush Monkey Hat
You guys are familiar with brain slugs, right? If you really want to take your chances, tell the apes that the monkey on your head is basically that - controlling your brain.
10. Gorilla Warrior
In the future, the apes probably will wear helmets. You might want to consider taking that into account.